In my travels, I've found there's geekery in almost very walk of life. There are computer geeks, audio-video geeks, food geeks, even 4X4 off-roading geeks and woodworking geeks and clothes geeks. These are folks who've found something that interests them, and who see all the possibilities in their chosen area of interest. All geeks have one thing in common: they're the ones who the rest of us consult when we want information or advice about something in their area of geekery. After all, why reinvent the wheel? If you need to know something in an area that you know little about, it will be only natural to consult an expert.
One small problem with this, however: there are good geeks, and there are not-so-good geeks. To get the information or assistance you're after, you need to choose the right kind. Here's a quick run-down of what my experience has taught me about a good geek vs. a bad geek.
A good geek listens; a bad geek just talks. Yes, this is painfully obvious, and yes, this applies not merely to geeks, but to everyone. I mention it here only because so many of the characteristics of a bad geek can be traced back to this one simple idea. Getting information or advice from a geek in any field requires communication, and as we know, communication is a 2-way street. If the geek you're talking to is more interested in wowing you (and anyone else who's listening) with their vast expertise than they are in really understanding your problem or question, then you probably only have at best a 50-50 chance at having that problem solved or that question answered--and you'll have to endure a lot of blather and yada-yada to get there.
The desire on the part of a geek to impress others with their knowledge is a simple function of the human ego. As ol' Doc Freud theorized years ago, every human has an ego, and we all manifest our ego in different ways. The bodybuilder subconsciously wants to impress us with how big and strong they are, the hunter (sorry, "sportsman") with how many animals he or she has killed. And with the exception of psychology geeks, most geeks probably aren't aware of this link between ego and information dissemination; they probably just figure that the more information they can give to someone about their area of expertise, the more benefit the person will get. That's not a bad or unhelpful position to take by any means, but too often the geek forgets to adequately determine what information the person needs before they begin to disseminate the information. How does a geek determine what the asker is really asking? By listening. By absorbing some information themselves rather than giving it--for the purpose of genuinely helping the person asking the question. It's the geek who knows how to do this that will be the most helpful geek to you. Listening skills trump simple expertise any day.
A good geek advises; a bad geek invalidates. When you consult a geek, often you need more than simple information; you have an actual goal in mind in their area of expertise, and you want advice on how to achieve that goal. A good geek will listen to exactly what your goal is, and give you frank, honest advice as to whether that goal is realistic. If it isn't, they'll guide towards an alternative goal. A bad geek will just invalidate your goal out of hand if they don't agree with it, i.e. if it's not something that they would do. They'll say something like "Why would you ever do it THAT way? Do it THIS way instead." Or worse yet, "Let ME do it." What's wrong with this, you ask? Invalidation of the person's viewpoint doesn't just communicate to the person asking the question or presenting the viewpoint that the geek doesn't agree with it; it implies that the person was foolish and uninformed/misinformed to ever have come up with that viewpoint in the first place. This places a negative connotation on the conversation in general, and gives the impression that between the two people, the geek is the only one who knows enough about that field of geekdom to have an opinion at all, and why would the person asking the question...even ask the question?
As in the case of talking without listening, invalidation serves mainly to stroke the geek's ego, while doing little if anything to get information to the person asking the question, so obviously that's the geek to try and avoid. You're much better off with the geek who communicates that your goal or point of view is valid, but that it may need a little tweaking based on facts that the geek knows, that you may not know. The good geek then points out the facts that may influence your goal or that suggest a more realistic goal, and then lets you decide on a course of action, or assists you if you're having a problem. However much the geek may know, if they're going to invalidate you, then for your purposes they may as well not know anything at all. Let them stroke that ego on someone else, and find yourself a better class of geek.
The good geek patiently explains himself or herself; the bad geek can't be bothered to. You might think this a contradiction to the earlier point about the geek who talks too much, but I assure you there is a difference. You go to a geek because you need information in their area of expertise, yet it's amazing how many geeks will give you that information and assume you know exactly what they're talking about. Assume that you've learned and experienced the exact same things that they have, and you'll be able to take what they say in exactly the same context as they do. In fact, in all likelihood, you're going to need some explanation of what the geek tells you, and you'll want to be sure you deal with a geek who's willing to give that explanation, in a pleasant, informative way.
Not only will the bad geek deem it unnecessary to give you an explanation of what they're saying, they may even be slightly offended at the idea that you'd want an explanation. What do you MEAN you don't understand? Are you saying I'm not good at explaining things? Yep, there it is again. Ego. Why do I keep harping on it? Because I see it over and over and over again. It all comes down to fear--in a geek's case, the fear that they don't know as much about their field of geekdom as they think they do. So everything they say or do is driven by this fear, rather than by helping you. You have to be on the lookout for this, and not just from strangers either; friends, family members, co-workers, everyone can potentially be either a good geek or a bad one. You may like a person or even love them, but that doesn't make them a good geek.
So there are a few thoughts on good vs. bad geeks; do you have thoughts of your own on this subject?
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